broken – Page 2

I wish I could permanently delete people from my life. Delete their memories, delete their aura. Delete everything they had to do with me. Delete the bond we shared, and the memories I am regretful of. Delete the laughter that shed from my mouth, delete the sorrow that was conveyed by my eyes. Delete the sight of losing people, delete the joy of regaining them. Delete the short lasting fun that we had, delete the everlasting arguments we’ve had. Delete what all I can, delete everything I can.

Yes, whether good or bad, right or wrong, salty or nasty, sweet or sour. I do not want to recall the memories that we’ve shared. Delete them all, for all I care.

© Khushi Suneja

Kim Jonghyun💔\\k.s

Published on December 21, 2017January 9, 2018 by Khushi7 Comments

So as some of you may know, a very talented young Korean man, Kim Jonghyun, the lead singer of the boyband SHINee, committed suicide on Monday (18 December 2017) and left us all with some memories of his to cherish and mourn. It is believed that he consumed very unhealthy amount of carbon monoxide, a very poisonous gas and died. Earlier, he had been sending disturbing messages to his sister, dropping hints of his mission, and in doubts his family and friends tried protecting him but it was of no use. He was taken to the hospital after the accident but was declared dead soon after. Two weeks before his death, he even sent a 47- line text to his friend Jang Hee- Yeon, a band member of Dear cloud, in which he clearly said that he was broken from the inside.

So pretty, clearly, the boy died due to mental issues, stress and depression. But the worse part, he was just 27, he had his whole life ahead of him. He was definitely getting too much of hate to bear which made him take such a big step.

Honestly speaking, since I am not that much into K-Pop(just familiar with a few artists), I didn’t know about him. Yet, I cried for him. I felt really really bad for what he did to himself. But seems like he had no choice.

I really don’t get it that why is there so much hatred in this world. Like how cruel can one be? How can people be that incredibily devilish? How can people hate on someone so bad as to push them to their death? What about the person’s feelings? No bother.

It has purely been due to the hatred that he had been receiving all this time that added up and lead to something this disastrous. Mental illness, what they say. Congrats to you haters, you won. And it has not been just for the first time that anyone has taken such a step. Just because he was famous, this issue had been brought into the limelight.

I hope people realize the mess they’ve caused because after Jonghyun, more than 100s of Shawols(SHINee’s fans) have committed suicide. This clearly needs to stop. It takes approximately 5 seconds to send hate to someone. But that person receiving it might feel bad for over 5 mins, 5 hours, 5 months or maybe 5 years…. you never know.

So, if you’re reading this, and you’ve ever sent hate to someone or want to, just stop. Picture yourself in their shoes. And then, you wouldn’t even dare to. I still feel that if people had been a lil sweeter, he would have still been alive. The world didn’t deserve him. I hope he’s in a better place now.

R.I.P Jonghyun 🌹\\ You will be missed.

Roses are deaf\\k.s

Published on December 16, 2017December 16, 2017 by Khushi2 Comments

Roses are deaf,

Violets blind.

My heart’s bereft.

Our fates interwined.

© Khushi Suneja

My eyes\\k.s

Published on December 11, 2017December 11, 2017 by Khushi2 Comments

My eyes hurt from the tears that I’d shed this morning. The tears I shed last night as well. I was all happy, until I heard you say, goodbye. My heart ached, and I started to cry.

How much my soul sinked, you’ve got no idea, when you left me in the middle of nowhere. I cried, cried and cried. But you seemed to take no notice of that.

I wonder what happened to my happily ever after.What happened to the perfect life that I’d imagined ahead of me?What happened to my life, what happened to me? What happened to you?

There was a time when we were inseparable. So perfect. So together. Now the tears that my eyes shed say, how lonely I really am. How lonely, I am gonna be, now that you’re gone.

My soul, tries.

My heart, dies.

My eye, cries.

© Khushi Suneja

My Scars\\k.s

Published on November 9, 2017December 7, 2017 by Khushi2 Comments

Your love tried to take the credit of my poetry. But unfortunately, my dear, it were your scars that compelled me to write.

I wonder if you look at yourself in the mirror and feel the same. Do you feel the way I feel? No, you don’t. You don’t have the scars to hide, or the marks to run away from.

I was never ever so pretty as much as you made me feel one day. Just like I was never ever this unfortunate as much as I felt this day.

You never ever even touched me. Yet, you left your marks. Now your scars lie all over my hands and legs, marks on my face, and bruises on my neck.

Do you have anything to regret? I hope you do. And I hope it’s the scars you are the most regretful of.

©Khushi Suneja

Midnight Reminiscing\\k.s

Published on November 4, 2017December 7, 2017 by Khushi4 Comments

Night 1,

I knew sitting alone at the corner of my room at midnight in dim lights would do me no good. Nor would thinking about you would. But it would give me enough reasons to write about the pain. The pain given by you.

Night 12,

We may not be a thing anymore. But I will assure that your memories stay in my poetry.

Night 25,

My mom kept asking me what happened to me the other day. I did not have the guts to mention your name.

Night 37,

I wonder if you stay awake at midnight too. Remembering me. Regretting me.

Night 59,

You used to be my only one. I used to be only one of them. I still remember.

Night 73,

Missing you, I feel was like my duty. But wanting you was my passion.

Night 82,

I wonder what made me like you in the first place. Just like what made you leave me in the last.

Night 100,

There was a time I used to write for you. Now I kinda write about you.

©Khushi Suneja

Roses are flawed\\k.s

Published on October 19, 2017October 19, 2017 by Khushi3 Comments

Roses are flawed.

Violets are blemished.

The people I loved and cared for,

Are the one that actually vanished.

Will you? \\k.s

Published on October 5, 2017October 5, 2017 by Khushi18 Comments

I have never been loved.

Why do you feel so? Replied the boy.

I don’t have a hand to hold this fall. With the leaves that are shedding, shed my self confidence and hope. No one to wipe my tears and say that I’m pretty. Look me into the eyes with utmost love, embrace my flaws and promise to love me till the next fall and many more. No one. None.

But what if you’re not able to see the love through your despairing eyes?

Am I really that unfortunate to not sense the love that exists? Am I really that flawed to not notice the one who loves(me)?

Not unfortunate, my love. Just despaired. He thought.

Look at those unfortunate trees, shedding the leaves with teary eyes but with the hope that they’ll retreat the next spring.

Well I have no one to hope for to come back. No one to say goodbye to, with the hope that they’ll come back.

The one who actually loves, will never leave, Susan. You wouldn’t ever have any goodbyes to give, a kiss to spare, or a hand to wave. Believe me. He’ll stay. All you have to do is remain like a tree, waiting for your hope and love to grow back like the leaves. Said the boy to the girl he loved.

Well, will you?

Will I what?

Will you stay?

Yes, had I loved you. He said, with a voice almost cracking, sweaty palms and teary eyes.

She cried a little and he smiled.

As he left for Vietnam, he waved at her as she waved back and he turned his head. She waved while muttering a love you behind his back.

As he muttered a love you too.

And so she waited like a tree in the fall, seeing her favourite flower gloom, waiting for the spring to come and bring him along.